Bored

What does a 3 year old do when they get bored while their mom is in the shower? Well, if it's a 3 year old named Peyton, he goes to the kitchen cupboard to rifle around. He spots the can of hot cocoa mix. He takes it out and dumps about 2 cups worth of it onto the kitchen floor, living room floor, fireplace mantle and living room couch. (2 cups worth of hot cocoa mix goes a long way.) He then proudly points out what he's done once his mom gets out of the shower and tells her she needs to vacuum it up. He then watches her vacuum and points at the mess saying, "I did that!" He gets scolded, but doesn't act remorseful. In the slightest little bit.

He then gets bored again while his mom is blow drying her hair and decides the same couch he earlier dumped hot cocoa mix on, needs a little something "more". So, he takes a black, ballpoint pen and "colors" on 2 of the cushions. When his mom finishes with her hair, he comes running and says, "I did it again! Come see! Come see!" He then proudly points out the new decoration and says, "yep! I did that!" He gets scolded, but doesn't act remorseful. In the slightest bit.

Kindness

Today, I'm very grateful for the kindness shown to me by a few strangers. I did a little shopping at Costco and came out to find a I had a flat tire. Of course, I had forgotten my phone at home and I knew that I had because the fact had occurred to me while on the way there. I had hesitated while driving, thought about going back, but decided I probably wouldn't need it. Guess I was wrong. ☺

I was a little worried about what I was going to do, but then a kind man came along and allowed me to use his phone so I could call Ryan. Of course, he (Ryan) was nowhere near me and wouldn't be able to get there for quite some time. He suggested that I try the tire center there. I thought that was a good idea and felt a little silly for not thinking of it myself since I was looking right at it when I called him. I thanked the man for the use of the phone and he offered to help me change the tire. I told him I would be fine, I was going to try the tire center.

The tire was too flat to drive on and so I walked back inside. I told the kind man inside the store my situation and he offered to come out and change the tire for me. While I was waiting for him at my car, two other men who were passing by offered to help. I thanked them for stopping, but was so happy to be able to tell them the situation was under control.

What would have taken me an hour on my own, took the tire center guy less than 10 minutes. Once changed, he had me drive over to the tire center bays and he checked my air pressure in all the tires. They were all quite low and so he filled them.

I'm so glad that I came across all of these very nice men and that they made what could have been a very stressful situation, barely a hiccup in my day.

Boundaries

I've decided that I need to set boundaries for myself when it comes to the Internet. (First off, let me say, no, this has nothing to do with me or my blog.) I do this because I've come to the conclusion that there are a lot of mean-spirited and downright cruel people lurking out there. Let me tell you why I think this.

You know how you can "like" pages on facebook? Well, I "liked" a few (I won't say which) and then would, of course, see their posts. I normally wouldn't ever read any of the comments left, or post one of my own because it just took too much time. Well, a few months ago, something kind of interested me. Something that I wanted to comment about. (Okay, I will say that this was for a clothing retailer and they were posting a picture of a shirt and the fact that it was on sale.) I clicked to do it and scrolled through the comments already left. Holy cow! I was totally shocked at how mean they were. I was totally unprepared for what I was reading. Some were directed at the page . They said things like they wouldn't even pay the sale price for the shirt. They said the shirt was hideous, etc. After comments like that, they started being directed at other commenter's. There was mocking and jeering and poking fun at others who had spelled something wrong. There was name calling and other petty bickering. It was just plain mean and it hurt my heart. I couldn't believe people could be so cruel to each other. And over something as silly as a shirt. I decided I shouldn't ever read comments again, but found myself morbidly interested in doing it. I wanted to know if every post was like that. So, I started reading comments on a regular basis. And guess what? The vast majority of posts had comments left like the first. It made me so very sad.

Last week, I was watching a YouTube video. I really enjoyed it and wanted to know what other people thought. Big mistake. The comments left were some of the most vicious and hateful things I've ever read. They were unreasonable and ridiculous. Mean and uncalled for. I was sad all over again.

I personally think the cloak of anonymity the Internet provides has killed civility. It's killed kindness. It's made it very easy for people to be jerks. And those who are, seem to love it. They seem to think that since they are most likely to never cross paths in real life with whomever they're interacting with, they're free to say whatever they like. There's no need to be civil to someone you'll never meet, right? I'd like to know why? When did people become so uncaring and decide that hurting the feelings of a stranger was fun? Whatever happened to: "if you can't say something nice, don't say anything at all"? There's absolutely no need to stir up contention among strangers because all it does is make you look like a terrible person. I know my approach to this probably sounds a little naive, but I can't think of any other way to say this.

So, I've decided that since I can't stop the mean comments, I have to just distance myself from them. I've "unliked" the facebook pages so I won't see their posts and I've resolved to not read comments left in other forums. I know that some might say sticking my head in the sand and ignoring something doesn't make it go away. But I don't think that's what I'm doing. I know that not every comment is cruel and there's plenty of good out there, but I'm tired of continually coming across the cruel. I know what my limits are. I know what I can and can't handle. I don't like feeling bad after reading that kind of crap. There's no need to do that to myself. So, I'm not going to do it anymore. I'm just going to do my best to be kind in my own little corner of the world. It's really all I can, or should do.

Blessed

Today, I just feel blessed. Yesterday was truly a wonderful birthday. It was calm, laid back and peaceful. It was everything I wanted and needed it to be. My kids made me adorable cards and Ryan gave me one of the best he's ever picked out. I am blessed.

• Blessed with a wonderful family, both immediate and extended.
• Blessed with wonderful friends.
• Blessed with good health.
• Blessed with love.

What more could a 35 year old girl ask for?

35

I love odd numbers. Love, love, love them. To me, they're balanced and the most beautiful of numbers. You can't divide them equally, but you can have a beginning, middle and an end. Like the word numBers. There's 3 letters in the beginning, 1 in the middle, 3 letters at the end. Kind of a stupid way of explaining it, oh well. I'll just say that odd numbers make me happy and leave it at that.

I say this because today is my birthday (shamelessly drawing attention to myself) and I'm so very happy to be an odd number age again. I am now going to attempt to come up with 35 useless trivia facts about myself.

1. I love taking very hot baths and love to soak in a tub.
2. On the reverse side of number 1, I don't like terribly hot showers and don't take very long ones. I find them irritating and annoying. Weird and I don't know why it is.
3. When I go through the drive-up of my bank, I feel compelled each and every time to push the "call" button after I've sent the tube. I want, need, HAVE to press it. I almost never have an actual reason to push it. Sometimes I can resist, but most often can't. I push it and then the teller asks me if I need help and I have to say, "no. I didn't really mean to push the button."
4. We've lived in our house for 5 years.
5. We've lived in our house for 5 years and I still turn my key the wrong way in the doorknob each.and.every.time.I.unlock.the.door. I turn it to the right even though I know it has to go left to unlock it.
6. I have 4 children and the fact that I have an even number does kind of agitate me. I'm not willing, however, to have another in order to soothe my agitation. My uterus is retired.
7. My husband and I have been married for 12 years, 2 months, 2 weeks and 5 days.
8. I really dislike the word treasure.
9. I also really dislike the word...oh, I don't know if I should say it....okay, I will: hubby. There. I said it. I don't know what it is about it, but I die a little inside when I hear/read it. I've never referred to Ryan using that word and the day I do is the day he can start calling me "wifey", or something like that. Please don't hate me for this.
10. I'm the oldest of 3 children.
11. I'm the only girl.
12. My parents have been married for almost 35 years and 11 months.
13. I love having my nails done and have been wearing acrylic nails on and off since I was 15.
14. I listen to classical music when I need to calm down.
15. I took piano lessons for 11 years and can't read music.
16. I probably have over 100 Santa figures, but only put out about 10 this year.
17. Large crowds freak me out.
18. I still have my favorite blanket that I've had for about 25 years. I keep it in a closet because Ryan hates it. He likes to tease me and say he's thrown it out. I like to irritate him by taking it out of the closet and spreading it out on our bed.
19. I like to do word searches. Very elementary school of me.
20. I was called to serve as the 1st counselor in the Young Women Presidency in our ward back in September. Ironic, considering I don't like teenagers. (Hi, any teenagers in the ward who may be reading this!) It's been a great and humbling learning experience. I'm actually learning to be less of a brat and to like teenagers more.
21. I'm currently obsessed with hot cocoa. I've never been a major, major fan of it. I've always thought it was good, but could really just take it or leave it. Most often, I've left it. On average, I've had about 3 glasses of it throughout a year. Since this last Friday, I've had 2 a day.
22. I like to paint with watercolors.
23. I haven't painted anything for 11 years. I constantly resolve to pull out my stuff and get back to it. I never do.
24. I don't like the sound of a ringing phone. It's too harsh.
25. My feet were a size 7 1/2 from the time I was about 13 and up until I was around 30. They're now a size 8. Apparently, pregnancy can make your feet grow.
26. It took until I was in my 30's for me to learn to like Cream of Wheat.
27. I read the book Charlotte's Web about 50 times when I was in the second grade. I loved it. In fact, it's where my daughter's name came from. Avery is the name of Fern's brother.
28. I've never had a cavity in my permanent teeth.
29. When I get a bad, bad headache, I take 2 Excedrin, 2 Tylenol and 4 Ibuprofen all at the same time. That drug cocktail will sometimes, sort of take the edge off the headache. Most often, I end up taking something else later. Usually 2 more Tylenol and 4 more Ibuprofen. I'm sure I'm destroying the lining of my stomach.
30. I love to iron. It's my quiet, relaxing time.
31. When I was in the 6th grade, my friend & I wrote fake notes from our parents saying that we had doctor appointments. We then walked from our school (the old Granger Elementary) to Valley Fair Mall behind the school and saw the movie Dirty Dancing.
32. I love wearing slippers, but hate when they're no longer as squishy as they were when brand new.
33. I go to my laundry room when I want to get away from things for a few minutes. I find it to be very relaxing and calming in there, for some reason.
34. I've had a wart on my right ring finger for about 5 years. I've had it burned off by a doctor a couple of times and done it myself more then a few times. It just keeps coming back. Thankfully, it's not that big and isn't horribly noticeable. At least, that's what I tell myself.
35. When I feel overly anxious and need to be comforted, I wear one of Ryan's shirts. It feels like a hug from him.

There you have it. Thirty five useless trivia facts about me you never wanted to know.

Online

Online shopping and more specifically, online shopping for Christmas, is the absolute best. I'm practically done with everything and I haven't had to leave my house. I've only had to pay minimal shipping because most items I've purchased have qualified for free shipping. Bonus! Packages have already started to arrive too! I'm telling you, this was totally made for crazy, impatient, easily irritated by crowds me.

I put up our tree on Saturday. I let the kids decorate it while I sat back and bit my tongue. Do you know how hard it is for a control freak to let an 8, 6 & 3 year old (10 year old had no interest in it) decorate a Christmas tree? Holy moly! I was a basket case by the time they were done. I tried my very best to not interfere while it was happening, but did make some minor adjustments after. There were huge areas where there were no ornaments and other 1 foot square ones that had 25 jammed into them. A little shifting and filling in of the gaps had to take place. Now it's time to put out the rest of the knick-knacks and I'll call it good.

Gratitude

Gratitude unlocks the fullness of life. It turns what we have into enough, and more. It turns denial into acceptance, chaos to order, confusion to clarity. It can turn a meal into a feast, a house into a home, a stranger into a friend. Gratitude makes sense of our past, brings peace for today, and creates a vision for tomorrow.-- Melody Beattie

I have so much to be grateful for. So very much. Not the least of which is my family. They are the source of so much joy. I love them. They're my life.

• I'm grateful for my church and my membership in it.
• I'm grateful for my testimony.
• I'm grateful for good books.
• I'm grateful for big furnaces.
• I'm grateful for warm blankets.
• I'm grateful for warm coats, gloves & scarves.
• I'm grateful for grandparents who don't mind letting my kids hang out with them.
• I'm grateful for good friends.
• I'm grateful for Dr. Pepper.
• I'm grateful for big mixers.
• I'm grateful for good food.
• I'm grateful for my treadmill.
• I'm grateful for the scriptures.
• I'm grateful for learning opportunities.
• I'm grateful for music.
• I'm grateful for laughter.
• I'm grateful for love and am very grateful I have it in my life.

Beautiful

Shhh....don't tell Ryan, but I'm trying to hypnotize him so he'll buy me one these little lovelies. It's so stunning, it takes my breath away.

Presently, I have the 4.5 quart Kitchen Aid stand mixer. Ryan & I received it as a wedding gift from his parents and grandparents. It's a perfectly lovely mixer and has served me very well these past 12 years. Unfortunately, it does have a few deficiencies. Some minor inadequacies.

You see, just about 2 years ago, I decided that I was going to make all of our bread. And I do. I do it at least twice a week. And I curse the mess my small mixer makes each time. The 4.5 quart bowl simply isn't big enough for the recipe I like to use. I spend more time cleaning up the flour that explodes out of the bowl and the bread dough that creeps up the hook and beyond, then I do actually making the bread. It's frustrating.

This, however, would take away all of my cares and frustrations. When making bread, that is. It's so amazingly beautiful, it brings tears to my eyes. No fooling. It's so sleek, so pretty, so big, so...not mess making. I wish I had one. I think my life would be complete if I did.

Reading

My son, Tyler, is a voracious reader and has been for years. (And, for the record, my son Cameron is a big time reader too. ☺) He'll read just about anything, but loves fantasy books the most. One of his favorite series of books is Fablehaven.

I was looking for something to read last month and so I went to his room which has so many books, it's almost like a library. I decided on the Fablehaven series because he's always raved about it. I must say, I've really been enjoying the books too. I'm currently halfway through the third book. Once I finish typing this, I'm going to go jump back into it. I don't care if they are children's books. They're fun and entertaining and reading them gives me something to talk about with Tyler. So there! I do have to say though, that the Seth character is so over the top naughty at times. As a mother, I want to just reach into the book and paddle his butt to knock some sense into him. Other then that, they're really great fun & very entertaining. That's what I want in a book!

To simply say he "loves" this would be an understatement

Peyton has watched this movie approximately 50,000,008 times since we bought it on November 2nd. He's totally enthralled with it and would watch it over and over and over and over with no breaks in between, if I would let him. It's so darn cute watching him watch it, I almost let him. When he wants to watch it, he has a routine he likes to go through. He has to gather up all of his Toy Story toys (and he has most of the characters, so that's a lot of toys), his pillow and his blanket, get situated on the couch, order me to turn it on, sit back, relax and watch. He's good to go indefinitely.

A couple of days ago, he picked up Woody & Buzz as the movie was starting and said, "Oh, HEY! This movie is about you guys!" He then turned them to the screen so they could watch with him. Can you say cute?

He loves to sing "You've Got a Friend in Me". His version is slightly different then the original. It goes something like this, "you've got a frenemy! You've got a frenemy!" Repeat that over and over. He doesn't really know the rest of the lyrics. I've never bothered to correct him, because haven't we all had a frenemy at one time in our lives? ☺

I know he's going to love the movie just as much on his 100,000,008th viewing as he does today and I really just think that's wonderful.

Fall

I don't have fall decorations for my house. It's already, like, halfway through November (well close to it), I have the desire to decorate the house and nothing to do it with. Bummer. How is this possible? I thought I had been making and collecting them for years, but was just too lazy to put them out. I've discovered that yes, I did make some. I just gave all of them away. I hope you're enjoying them. Whoever I gave them to.

I'm thinking about actually decorating for Christmas before the second week of December. Perhaps, just before Thanksgiving to make up for the fact that I didn't fill my house with pumpkins and leaves. Most of my Christmas decorations are sitting in my dining/storage room because I left them there when I boxed them up last year. You know, to make it easier to decorate this year. Last year, I had to trudge back and forth from my garage to my house through 8 inches of snow in order to bring the decorations in. I decided to save myself that aggravation and have left them in the house, in plain sight since last December. No carrying through the snow this year.

Today

"How fragile life, how certain death.
We do not know when we will be required
to leave this mortal existence.
And so I ask, 'What are we doing with today?'
If we live only for tomorrow,
we'll eventually have a lot of empty yesterdays."

-President Thomas S. Monson

I try very hard to live in the moment. Sometimes, it's to my detriment. Like, when my kids are being extremely naughty, I get overwhelmed and think that they're always going to be naughty. Like, for the rest of their life and forever. It's never going to get better and I might as well give up. I eventually come to my senses, look past my own nose and realize that a tantrum can't possibly last forever and I try get over it. It's stuff like that that's hard for me to see past. But....I do try. And try. And try. And try to live for right now.

I'm not a person who likes to do "countdowns". Like, "only 47 more days until....". I just don't do that. When we go on vacation, for example, I don't start packing a week in advance. I do it the night before, or sometimes, even the day of. Starting too soon just feels like a waste of time to me. Don't get me wrong, I plan for and take care of the necessary things. Especially if the kids aren't coming along. I have to make sure all arrangements are taken care of for them. I've just found that if I get overly consumed with the future, I get overwhelmed and anxious and forget what I have to do in the present. The present gets neglected and things fall apart.

Seasons change, people come and go, children throw fits, children grow up, weight is gained and lost, we all age, wrinkles happen. Complaining about it isn't going to do me a darn bit of good because all I'll have in the end is a lot of empty yesterdays because I was too busy focusing on tomorrow. So, I'm thankful for right now. Today.

My dream is maybe, possibly, hopefully coming true

Peyton is potty training himself. I tried training him for about 1 week before giving up. I could tell it was going to be hard and frustrating for both of us. So, rather than creating aggravation, I just let it go. Plus, I decided I could live with him running around naked. Just as long as he kept the nudity at home and didn't do it in public.

Starting a couple of weeks ago, he decided that peeing in the toilet wasn't such a bad thing. He even started getting out of the bathtub to do it instead of standing up and and whizzing in there. He's been going at random times throughout the day too. Not everyday, mind you, but just enough to give me hope that he can be fully trained by his fourth birthday. In a year.

In 12 Days

In 12 days Ryan and I will be celebrating our 12th wedding anniversary. 12 years!? That's really kind of a long time when you think about it. It's also really not. The time has flown by. And it hasn't. We've changed and grown in so many ways. In some ways, we haven't. (Ryan knows what I'm talking about.) We learn more about each other each day. There are some things about each other that we'll never figure out. Ryan is the same size he was when we got married. I'm not. (Although, I am getting close. ☺) We still love each other. That part hasn't changed. In fact, I would say that we love each other even more and it's only going to grow with each passing year.

Angry Birds, Angry Christa

Have you ever heard of this app for the iPhone and iPod? I let Tyler download the demo version of it a few months ago. He was the only one who played it for the longest time. He would rave about how fun it was and tell me that I really needed to try it. I finally did. He was right. It was kind of fun and, well, stupid at the same time. And by stupid, I mean stupid in the way that it's hard to put it down. I went through all of the demo levels and was perfectly content with it. Tyler kept telling me I needed to buy the full app because there's only so much you can do with the demo. I told him there was no way I was paying $0.99 (steep, I know ☺) just to fling birds at pigs. Last week, I finally caved and did it. Again, because it's stupid, hard to put down and hypnotizes you into wanting more.

Now, I did say that it was fun, but it is also INFURIATING. At least it is to me. The whole concept is you fling birds from a slingshot at pigs who are surrounded by increasingly complicated structures. You destroy the stone, wood, rocks, etc and in the process, you hopefully bean the pigs and destroy them. If you don't get the pigs, the blankety blank things smile, snort and laugh at you. I finally had to start playing with no sound so I didn't have to hear the condescending noise. (You're right. Patience is not one of my virtues.) You can't advance to the next level until you complete the current one. Duh! That sounded dumb, but you get what I mean.

I was stuck for two days on a level that for the life of me, I just couldn't complete. I can't even begin to describe the amount of rage I was feeling over being unable to do it. I was at my wit's end until I finally decided to do what my kids do. I turned to the Internet to solve my gaming problem. I went to the maker's site and found tutorial videos for each level. I watched the one I was stuck on, went back to the game and did it just like the tutorial showed and wouldn't you know it. I was able to smash the stupid pigs on that try. I screamed, did a victory dance and then yelled at my iPod, "take that you stupid pigs. Let's see you try and outsmart Christa again. I have the Internet and tutorial videos on my side now. Prepare to die!" Yes, I am a huge dork and I am officially addicted to a thoroughly stupid game. Oh well.

Dear DSW,

I love you, with all my heart. I don't know why it took until a month ago for me to try you out, but I am so glad I did. You are amazing. I now own these and two other pairs that I can't seem to find on your website. Dang, because they're really hot. You better believe that I'll be back for more.

Six

Avery, you're six years old today and I don't even know how it's possible.

• You'll be starting 1st grade in a few short weeks and will be at school all day.
• You're becoming more independent.
• You're a beautiful dancer.
• You are such a good helper. (Sometimes, you can be too much of a help. ☺)
• Your laugh is contagious.
• You're creative and have an amazing imagination.

We have a full schedule today to make all of your birthday wishes come true. You and I will be going for manicures and pedicures, some jewelry making will be happening and we'll have dinner at Chick-Fil-A at your request. Should be fun!

I love you very much Avery and can't imagine my life without you! Have a very Happy Birthday The Most Special-est Queen Avery!

Don't act like you're not impressed

I actually did it. I added new songs to my running and it didn't throw off my groove. I would even say I had an excellent run. I reached the 2 mile mark faster then I have in ages. (No, I won't tell anyone what my time was.) I went 3.16 miles total. (No, I won't tell anyone how long it took me to go that far.) I.am.awesome. I hope to add some distance and shorten my time (even if it's just a bit) when I run again on Thursday.

Some things I would love Pt. 3

• Dust repellent furniture. I don't mind dusting and do it at least once a week, but I wouldn't be sad if I never had to do it again.
• To find the handle that flushes the toilet in our guest bathroom. Peyton lost it months ago. Why the manufacturer made a toilet with a removable handle is beyond me. Now, flushing is an interesting challenge.
• To find a swimming suit that effectively hides my thunder.
• To ask my kids to do some kind of chore and not have any, even tiny complaints uttered. A cheerful response would be lovely.
• For Peyton to catch on that when I sit him on the toilet, he should do his business in it. Not just sit for about 10 seconds, jump down and flush. And not do that about 10 times in a row.
• For my kids to learn to control the volume of their voices. There is a difference between an inside voice and an outside one.
• For Peyton to be willing to add a couple more movies to his repertoire. I like The Incredible, Monsters, Inc. and Up just as much as him, but wouldn't mind something else thrown into the mix.
• To be able to make bread in the summer and not have the oven heat up the house in the process. It's awesome in the winter and it's 30 degrees out. Not as awesome when it's 95.
• A sprinkler system in my yard. It really isn't that big of a hassle to haul around the hose and spend all day watering the yard, but this is another thing I wouldn't be sad over never having to do again.
• For earwigs to cease to exist. I'm not scared of them, or anything like that. However, they are disgusting looking and I hate finding them in my house.

And isn't it ironic, don't you think?

I find it very ironic that exercise (which is good, necessary, important, blah blah blah, for your body) can leave your body feeling so stiff and sore you can hardly move/use it. Thereby causing you to only want to lay, unmoving with ice or heat packs covering it to ease the stiffness.

I don't want to do it, but I have too

Because Peyton won't keep his clothes or diaper on, I've decided to start potty training him. If he would just keep his clothes on, I wouldn't be starting. I think potty training is the most pure form of evil and was hoping to avoid doing it with him. My thought was to just let him do it himself. You know, when he was ready. Because that can happen. Right?

I bought some Pull-ups (for the days when I get sick of dealing with accidents), underwear of his choosing and a Buzz Lightyear costume as incentive. The idea with the costume is that he has to keep Buzz dry, or Buzz will get very sad. I'll probably try some sort of candy trick too. I'm sure it's going to be easy peasy. Uh-huh. If he follows the same timeline as his brothers, he'll be fully potty trained in about a year.

I'm scared.

I have to listen to the same songs each and every time

I'm still doing P90X. What I am not doing is the Plyometric or other cardio workouts of the program. I've been substituting those with running. I should probably say "running" because it's really more like jogging. Or, perhaps it's a soft "j" and it's yogging. Anyway, I've been running a lot more. Every other day, in fact.

I'm a serious creature of habit. I really don't like to change things. I can't even rearrange my furniture because (1) that would require work and (2) I don't like things to be different. Different scares me. It throws off my routine. My bed has sat in the same spot in which it was placed almost 5 years ago when we moved in. And I'm totally fine with that. I would say the only thing I'm okay with changing is my hair color.

I have to listen to the same music and in the same order each time I run. It goes like this:

1. Lovers in Japan/Reign of Love - Coldplay
2. Viva la Vida - Coldplay
3. Mr. Brightside - The Killers
4. Somebody Told Me - The Killers
5. All These Things That I've Done - The Killers
6. Hysteria - Muse
7. In Da Club - 50 Cent
8. Holla Back Girl - Gwen Stefani
9. Lose Yourself - Eminem (This one is my power song. It pushes me and gets me through at the end. I will sometimes listen to it 3 times in a row, but I only ever listen to it at the end of my run.)

That's it. I don't ever get sick of any of them. However, I'm trying to go for longer runs and have come to realize I kind of need to add a couple more songs to the mix. I'm psyching myself up for it, but if my bed has been in the same place for 5 years, imagine how long it will take me to add a song.

Counting down

Avery's birthday is on the 27th of this month. She has been counting down since July 28, 2009.

She's asked for a few things:

• a Pillow Pet
• a snake for a pet
• a hamster for a pet
• a baby sister for a pet

I'm only willing to get her one of those things.

Battle of wills

I have a very strong personality. I like things the way I want them to be. Avery has a very strong personality. She likes things the way she wants them to be. You can imagine what happens when two strong wills meet.

Lately, Avery has been in a "I don't want to eat this dinner" mood. Like, every night. She sits at the table for ages after everyone else is done and everything but her plate has been cleared away. She stares at her food. She plays with her food. She sings songs to her food. She does dances for her food. She does everything but eat her food.

A couple of nights ago, I was really sick of it. I set a timer for 5 minutes and told her that if she didn't finish in that time, she was going to bed for the night. (Just so you know, yes, I've tried this trick before. No, it's never worked because I've never followed through with my going to bed threat. I was determined to not be a wimp on this night.) She played her same old game for the entire 5 minutes. The timer went off, I checked her plate and saw all the food on it. I took her by the arm and took her to her room. She went kicking, screaming and begging to be given another chance. I told her I was very sorry she was upset, but it was her own fault she was going to bed so early. I told her if she wanted to avoid having this happen again, all she had to do was eat her dinner. She then said, "well, just make sure that you always make something I want to eat and we'll never have this problem again." AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Maybe I lack compassion

I can't stand when people wander through grocery store parking lots asking for money. I especially hate when they ambush you as you're loading your groceries into your car. You're focused on what you're doing and not really paying attention to what's going on around you. When, WHAM, someone suddenly appears and you hear, "excuse me miss. Do you have some change I can have?" It's usually followed by something like, "I'm all out of gas and I need to get to ___________. " (Fill in the blank.)

It's even worse to be ambushed in this way when you have 4 kids in tow. Kids you're yelling at to stop running around the parking lot and get in the car. Stop fighting. Leave each other alone and just put your seat belts on. No, you can't have your candy bar until we get home. Just be patient and wait. Fine just give me 2 minutes to get the rest of this stuff in the car and then I'll look for your stupid candy bar. I don't care if you want it now, you have to wait. Fine if you can't wait, you can't have it at all. It's mine now.

Anyway, I don't like it. I very rarely give anything because to me, it very rarely seems genuine. Most I have encountered have seemed so casual/comfortable, dare I say rehearsed, I immediately say I have no cash and turn away.

Once, while in the parking lot of Costco, a woman came up to me and said she had discovered she was out of gas. She said she had just spent the last of her money in Costco and now didn't know how she was going to get home. She made sure to tell me that she had no money in her checking account and so her debit card wouldn't work. She didn't have credit cards she could use either. She seemed highly embarrassed and was a little weepy. I almost gave in to my snarky impulse and told her she should go return something she had just bought to get the money she needed for gas. I mean really, she knew how much gas and money she had when she left her house. It wasn't my fault that she had driven too far and spent all of her money before putting in more gas. But...I didn't do that. I gave her the 2 or 3 dollars I had in my pocket. She thanked me profusely and moved on to the next person. I don't know why I gave it to her, but I haven't given anything since that time.

I don't know why I find this so irritating, but I do. I guess I'm so annoyed about it right now because I've witnessed it happening on 3 separate occasions this week alone. I know I could and should be more compassionate. I'm working on it. I know that this post is very rambly and unnecessary, but I just needed vent. And that's all I have to say about that. The end.

It's a good thing I think he's cute

Because he's seriously naughty. (Being so darn cute and yes, he knows he's cute, saves him. A lot.) Not mean and destructive naughty. Mischievous naughty. He's taken the terrible 2's to a whole other level. A level I've never experienced with 3 previous children. He's giving me a run for my money. I ♥ him!

I'm Happy

I took my body measurements last night. I'm happy with the results. I know they could be better if I had just worked a little harder, but I had a few interruptions during my 90 days. My interruptions threw off the momentum a bit. They didn't totally mess me up, but I know that I would have slightly better results if they hadn't happened. I don't want to have excuses, but it's reality. I had 2 vacations, one bout of bronchitis and one of strep throat (just last week) that kind of threw off my continuity. I did all but 3 of the workouts because of the sickies and made up the days missed because of vacations.

My Results:

Weight lost: 13.4 lbs.

Body fat % lost: 3.9% (I do wish this one was lower because believe me, I have fat to spare. This just tells me I need to be far more diligent and disciplined with my diet.)

Chest: 1/2 in. lost

Waist: 1 1/2 in. lost

Hips: 1 3/4 in. lost

Right thigh: 1 in. lost

Left thigh: 1 in. lost

Right arm: 1/4 in. gained

Left arm: 1/4 in. gained

You may remember (I'm assuming here that people read this) that I lost weight and inches about a year ago when I did Slim in 6. I think I gained back about 5-8 pounds during my little workout hiatus. Also known as a period in which I was super lazy. So, I lost that weight plus a bit more. Fortunately, I didn't really gain back any of the inches I lost last year. Hooray! That means these inches are extras. Looking at the total of inches lost, it doesn't look like a whole ton. And it really isn't. But....it's a good start. I know I can and will do better my next go around. I'm looking forward to it.

Round 1 Completed

I've finished 12 weeks of P90X. I haven't done my final measurements or fitness test yet as I had a mother of a headache last night. I didn't want to do anything but lay on my bed and feel sorry for myself. I'll do those tonight with Ryan because it's impossible to do a chest measurement on your own. I know I shrunk, I just don't know by how much.

I'm doing a recovery week this week and then I'll jump back in again next Monday. I'm planning on being a P90Xer for life. Wow. That sounded really dorky.

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Because I was busy wallowing is headache land self-pity, I didn't get around to saying anything about Ryan yesterday. You know, Father's Day. So, a few bullet points to make up for it:

• I think you are incredibly handsome. In fact, I think you get better looking with each passing year. I love that you're getting gray hairs. I happen to have a thing for gray haired men. I know, it's weird.
• Your butt looks really good in the pants I gave you. (Yes, I am doing my level best to finally illicit a comment/response from him about my blog.)
• You are a good friend to so many people.
• You're giving of your time, talents, energy, etc. You're willing to do whatever it takes.
• You have a great sense of humor.
• You love me.

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I want to say congratulations to my brother David & his wife, Adriana. They shared the wonderful news yesterday that they are expecting their first baby. Baby Mackay is due to arrive in February. I'm so happy for you both!

Making strides

I'm 2 pant sizes smaller than I was when I started working out regularly in December. Well, technically...I'm probably, actually, 3 sizes smaller. But, I'm not willing to take the plunge and buy more pants in the next size down. I only bought the ones I'm currently wearing in the last month. Plus, it makes me feel kind of good that my current size, which I haven't been in about 6 years, is looking kind of saggy. I'm going to hang on to them until it becomes impossible to keep them up. I don't say this to brag. I say this to keep myself motivated. I don't want to slip up again and take backwards steps. I'm done with all of that.

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I have a couple of sick kids today. Avery has been doing her best re-enactment of The Exorcist every couple of hours since 3:00 a.m. And Peyton has it coming out the other end. I'm so happy I get to spend a long, holiday weekend cleaning up bodily fluids. Lucky me! Oh, and I can't wait until the other 2 kids get it!

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I've almost talked myself into doing a giveaway.

My brain is like a sieve

I can't seem to hold on to a thought. I sit down to blog and everything I was thinking about just runs right out of my mind. Same thing happens when I try to type a comment. I can't think of anything that hasn't already been said. So, I just don't say anything at all. I guess I've had what you could call writer's block. I'm going to blame the lengthy winter we've had. (Can you believe we had snow last week?) I've always thought that I loved winter. I've felt like it was my season. But I'm starting to recognize that cold, dark days send me into a bit of a funk. Perhaps, it's not really my kind of season after all.

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Summer break starts for my kids next week. At this current moment, I'm actually looking forward to it. I get just as burned out with the daily routine of elementary school as my kids do. I appreciate the break. For like a week, two tops. By that time, they're all "bored" out of their minds and have caused me to lose mine.

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I'm thinking about having a little giveaway and I'm thinking about giving away something that I made. Something that starts with w and ends with atch. You know the kind because you've seen them everywhere. I'm not totally sure that I want to do it. Giving away something that I made kind of makes me nervous. Give me a few more days to ponder this.

A short ode to Ryan, just because

I realize that by doing this today, I will most likely tap out my brain for ideas of things to say when Father's Day rolls around, but I just feel like I need to do this. I love this boy and I want to let him know that.

I love the kind of father you are. It's fascinating to watch you with each of our children. You are so much more patient with them then I've ever even thought of being. You're a fun dad. You're a loving dad. You're a hard working dad and you don't shirk your responsibilities. In any aspect of your life. You're a wonderful example to all of them. And to me.

You're sneaky. You constantly surprise me by giving me everything I want. I, most often, don't even have to say it out loud. You quietly pay attention and then just show up with whatever my selfish little self wants at that moment.

You take me on amazing vacations. I love to travel with you. I can't wait until we go back to Paris in September.

You still won't watch my favorite chick flicks with me, but I think I'm wearing you down. The Jane Austen tome you gave me for Mother's Day was a good sign. You want to watch them, you just don't know it yet.

You're funny, goofy, irritating, loving, kind, wonderful, impossible, stubborn, beautiful and I love you. With all my heart.

Life, liberty and the pursuit of happiness

Ryan and I are going to Washington DC the first week of May. I'm really looking forward to it. It's a place I've always wanted to visit.

As with all of our trips, I'm letting Ryan handle things. I just don't like to be bothered with planning and the finer, detailed points of a vacation. I know that it's totally contradictory to my generally control freak personality, but I just like to go where I'm going and not worry about how I'm going to get there. Ryan likes looking at maps and figuring stuff out. So, I leave it all to him.

A little of this and a little of that

I'm still doing P90X. Pretend that's the reason I've been neglecting my blog. Let's say that I've been so focused on getting ripped *snort*, I haven't had time to spew out my usual dribble here. Yes, let's say that.

The first 2 weeks of P90X were butt kickers. I didn't even do the entire 2nd week, but not because I gave up. We went to St. George, Utah during that week and I had every intention of doing the workouts while there, but it just didn't happen. So, I decided to repeat it. Technically, I should be starting my 5th week today, but I'm calling it my 4th. It's the "recovery" week, but there's no rest and relaxation involved. You recover by doing two days of yoga instead of one. There's also Kenpo karate and core work in there. The only thing about it that could be considered easier is the fact that you aren't lifting weights, doing pull-ups or push-ups. By the way, I've gone from doing 2 or 3 of certain push-ups, to now doing about 10. That's right. I'm bad.

Do I dare say I enjoy it? I think I do dare to say that. It really isn't as horrible as I thought it would be. Wait, what!?

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I can't keep clothes on Peyton anymore. Finding him stripped down to just a diaper, or totally butt naked is now a common occurrence. He prefers to let his goods flap freely in the wind. He fights me when I try to dress him. He screams, "I NOT COLD!" Or, "I NOT NEED TO GET DRESSED!" I think the only way I'll be able to keep him dressed all day, will be to keep him in footed pajamas with the zipper safety pinned closed. Unfortunately, I think he would find a way to get out them.

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Avery told me for a couple of weeks before Easter that I needed to get "repaired" (prepared) for it. She's also been saying that she can't wait until she's eight and can be "bathtized" (baptized). She refuses to stop saying "muse" for use. She's also been an ultra brat lately. We were shopping last week and she found some stupid stuffed animal she wanted me to buy for her. I told her no because the last thing she needs is another stuffed animal. She started throwing a fit. I told her to knock it off and she said, "no! Here's the deal: I'm going to keep acting like a brat until you get sick of it and get me what I want. When I get what I want, I'll be nice." My blood pressure shot up so high, my head nearly exploded. I'm also pretty sure I cracked a couple of teeth because I clenched them so hard to keep myself from screaming.

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I think that's all I have for now.

Mish mash

This week, our elementary school is having a "Mother/Son Night". I saw it on the school calendar and said, "ooooo.....a Mother/Son night. How exciting! Let's go. It'll be just like Mother Boy." (If you've seen Arrested Development, you know what Mother Boy is. My boys have seen Arrested Development and so they know what it is.)

Tyler immediately yelled, "NO WAY! I'm NOT interested. It would be too embarrassing."

"Embarrassing?", I said. "It's not like I would be the only mom there. Hello. It's a Mother/Son thing. Everyone will be there with their moms, you creep." Yes, I really did call him a creep.

He said, "I don't care. I DON'T want to go." I tried coaxing him some more. No dice. I told him, "fine. I know Cameron will want to go with me. He loves his mother." I turned to him and said, "how 'bout it? We'll have so much fun together." He thought about it and for a moment it seemed that he wanted to go. He then said, "ummm...no thanks. It would just be too weird." Punks.

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I started P90X this morning. No, my husband didn't force me, or nag me, or anything. I decided to do it all on my own. Trust me, I'm just as surprised as you are. My current workout routine is good, but it's only going to take me so far. If I want more results, I have to do more.

In preparation, I did my fitness test last night and was pretty sure I was going to die. You have to do a heart rate test to measure how it changes from an elevated one, back to resting. In order to elevate your heart rate, you have to do jumping jacks for 2 1/2 minutes. Have you ever tried to do jumping jacks for 2 1/2 minutes? I never have. I've learned that it sucks and it sucks BIG time. Try it and see for yourself.

After torturing myself with the jumping jacks, I watched the first workout ("Chest & Back") to get an idea of what I was in for. "Chest & Back" is about 45 minutes of push ups and pull-ups. I got so nervous/scared while watching it, I literally cried. Cried. But, I did it this morning and I did the whole thing. There were a couple of different kinds of push ups that I was only able to do 2 or 3 of, but I did them. They probably weren't very pretty but, again, I did them and I don't feel that bad right now. However, Ryan tells me that tomorrow is when I'll really be able to feel them and I'll feel horrible. Great.

Pretty things

Boob Nazi is having a giveaway. If you leave a comment on her blog, you will be entered to win one of these pieces of jewelry. It's all so pretty. I want one of everything.

It's official

Yesterday, I was released from my calling as Primary President. I've known for about a month and a half that it was coming. My husband was called to be the Elders Quorum President and in our stake, they generally don't like having a husband and wife serve as the President of an organization at the same time. It makes sense.

I served for just over 3 years. Three years that I loved. I worked with 2 amazing counselors, 2 amazing secretaries, countless teachers, and I can't remember how many different music people. ☺ (No, not 2 secretaries at the same time. The first one, who happened to be my sister in law, moved.) They were such a help to me and I love and appreciate all of them. I can't adequately express it in words and so, I'll just have to leave it at that. Just know that I love all of you.

I can't and won't say that I was thrilled when I received the calling. I didn't want to have to be around my children each and every Sunday. I know that sounds harsh, but I thought that they would misbehave if I was in there. I was pretty sure it was going to be terrible. I was wrong. Avery had some adjusting to do when she first came into Sunbeams, but it wasn't terrible. My boys had their sarcastic moments, but they do that to everyone and so I can't complain. I may not have wanted to do it in the beginning, but I wouldn't trade the experience now for anything. I learned so very much. The number one thing being to appreciate the plain and simple truths of the gospel.

I'll miss Primary, but I am truly very excited to see what path I'll be walking down next.

'bout time

We're this close to being done with our guest bathroom remodel. It's only taken us 3 years to do it. Not too bad. Pictures to come. If I feel ambitious enough to figure out where I need to download to because no, I still haven't figured out how to use Windows 7. So what. ☺

Pinky

Tyler has pink eye. Yuck. He went to school yesterday looking totally normal and feeling fine. He came home with a very red, swollen and oozing eye. Great. I took him to the doctor last night and we're now treating it. It's looking much better today.

This morning, Avery said to me, "you know, Tyler's pink eye looks really cool! It makes him look like a pirate. Argh! I hope I get pink eye so I can look like a pirate too. Argh!"

Sadly, because pink eye is so blasted contagious, she will probably get her wish. Argh!

Everybody was Kung Fu fighting

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Avery informed me last night that she wants to learn Kung Fu so that the next time Cameron is mean to her, she'll be able to beat him up. She then proceeded to beat up anything that crossed her path. Like the freezer, washer & dryer, doors, etc. I'm seeing a bloody nose, or something in my future.