Oh sweet mystery of life

This is a post about my husband. Not a complaining one (well kind of) because I love him. I really do. This is a list of some of the mysterious things he does. Things that kind of annoy me, yet sometimes find cute, but mostly leave me wondering "Why?".

This is also a test to see if he ever reads my blog. Occasionally, he will mention something, but I'm pretty sure he doesn't read often. So, I don't want anyone telling him about this post. That means you dad. Yes, you. No asking him if he read it, or telling him he should. No little hints or saying that you have a secret about him. No matter how much it kills you to keep it to yourself, and I know it is already, you can't say anything to him about this. I want to see how long it takes him to find out on his own.

• In our laundry room, we have bins of sorts for putting dirty laundry in. You can see pictures of them here. There's a bin for underwear, socks, shirts, jeans, etc. Ryan, for some strange reason, never actually places his dirty items of clothing inside the bins. He drapes them across the front. Why? Is it kind of like a "food can't touch on my plate" quirk? Which, by the way, is just plain weird. He can't have his laundry mixing with the rest. Does he want to make sure I notice he was a good boy and put the item of clothing where it's supposed to go? Is it his passive aggressive hint that I need to do laundry? I don't know.
• He has a goatee. He's had it pretty much always since we've been married. (I know that sentence doesn't make sense. I don't care.) He's shaved a couple of times for reasons like Halloween. (He goes all out when he dresses up. He likes to be authentic.) Another time, he was the Young Men's President and he went with the youth on a pioneer trek. He grew out a full beard and then shaved it into a Brigham Young style one for the trek. Yes, it totally grossed me out. The reason he doesn't ever shave it off is because I won't let him. I like the goatee. When he does shave it off, it really creeps me out. I find his upper lip scary when it's bare. Don't ask me why. Anyway, it's necessary to occasionally trim the goatee. He does this in the bathroom. Well duh, of course he does it in there. It's not like he would do it at the dinner table. He leans over the sink when he does it so that the hair will fall into it. Once he's done, he doesn't rinse out the sink. He just leaves it in there. Somehow, every time he does it, he manages to do it on the same day I've cleaned the bathroom. I love a clean bathroom. I love walking in and seeing everything sparkle. I know that it doesn't last for long and so I treasure the time that it does. It's like a knife through my heart to walk into it and see the sink full of hair. I don't think it would matter when I did it. I could clean the bathroom at three in the morning and he would most likely instinctively wake up and feel the need to trim his goatee.
• He has a hard time throwing candy wrappers and such into the garbage. He simply places them on the kitchen counter. If he's in the bedroom, he will leave them on the bedside table. If he's downstairs in the family room, he places them on the nearest surface. The bookshelf where we keep our DVD's and games. One time, I was standing at the sink doing dishes and he came in and placed his garbage down on the counter. I said, "are you kidding?" He said "what?" all innocent like. I turned, pointed at the garbage can and said, "it's right there!" This one actually does make me a little crazy.

So, there you have it. A few little, tiny gripes. Nothing serious. All easily dealt with, but still slightly annoying and puzzling. I'll probably never figure any of them out. For the record, yes, I do a few things that annoy him. I'm only 99% perfect. I'm practically there. ☺

Now, let's see how long it takes him to see this.