Comparisons

*I had this scheduled to post on Friday the 13th. Then Blogger ate it and so I did something else, but now it's back. Maybe the one I had scheduled for today will show up again and I can post it tomorrow. Fingers crossed.*

I bought the book "Created for Greater Things" by Jeffrey R. Holland when I was buying books for my mom and mother in law as gifts for Mother's Day. I had already given a copy of it to my mom for her birthday. I bought something that I thought my mother in law would like, for her. I picked up the Holland book as a spare. (You know that really means that I bought it as a gift to myself. ☺) I've always loved Elder Holland and his straightforward, direct, tell it like it is way. I've never been disappointed after listening to him.

This particular book is a collection of quotes from him. I've been so uplifted by many of them. The following is one that jumped out at me the other day:

"Try not to compare your children, even if you think you are skillful at it. You may say most positively that "Susan is pretty and Sandra is bright," but all Susan will remember is that she isn't bright and Sandra that she isn't pretty. Praise each child individually for what that child is and help him or her escape our culture's obsession with comparing, competing, and never feeling we are 'enough'."

This is something that I am ashamed to admit I am guilty of. I don't mean too, but I sometimes compare and measure my children up against each other. They are each individuals with unique personalities. I love this fact, but sometimes get resentful over it at the same time. Why? I guess because I think it would be easier to raise them if they were all predictably the same. Well, no more. It would be totally and completely boring to be raising children who were all exactly alike. I would never grow and neither would they. Even if I'm trying to do it positively and with the best of intentions. It's time to stop that way of thinking and love and appreciate them entirely and only just for who they are. Without judgement of faults, shortcomings and differences. There are 4 of them and I will praise and love each one of them together, but individually as well. It's what they deserve and more importantly, it's what they want and need.